One of "those" moods!

Tired. Stressed. Anxious. Snappy. Emotional.

That pretty much sums up how I am feeling right now!

Believe it or not, I am holed up in my bedroom like a teenager having a tantrum over, well, nothing. I actually feel like a pimply 15 year old sulking because I didn't get my way. The problem is, I don't really have a right to be acting like this. In fact, I have been getting my way pretty much all day!

My other half and I spent the day shopping for his big boy's birthday tomorrow, spending far too much money. He even bought me a warm jacket for winter, which is very unlike him.

I think it must be the over tiredness getting to me. Now I know how poor little man feels when he hasn't slept for awhile and the smallest thing sets him off! I am also in a bit of a funk because he is currently refusing most bottles coming his way and most of his solids - how is he still smiling?! My  bets are that this is happening because of teething and his snuffly nose, but my God child, do you have any idea how on edge this gets me?! Constantly worrying about dehydration, hunger, his ability to sleep - it really does get too much sometimes! And his naps! How do they go from being lovely and long one day to basically non-existent the next? Today you would have thought he had never been to sleep before the way he battled and screamed with every attempt! News flash kid - you have these every day! And I would love to have a sleep every two and half hours, but society says no!

And poor other half! He hasn't even done anything wrong but I spit tacks at  him every time he tries a conversation! You would have thought that after four years of me he would know not to approach me in these situations, but I know he wants to get to the bottom of it!

Bottom line - I'm hungry, I'm tired, now just leave me the fuck alone!

Promise me we all feel like this sometimes?!

What a week....

You know, sometimes karma is a real bitch. And this week, ladies and gentlemen, it really came back to bite me in the ass.

First of all, I've been doing extra days at work to try and make a bit of money. Little guy comes with me and is perfect. So, there I was expecting a nice big pay and...not all of it went through. There goes my hair appointment.

Second of all, Thursday was the last day of term. This is always a big night out, and I had planned for it for weeks. We were going to an all you can eat and drink pizza place and I was so excited. However, in my excitement I forgot that I am now a mum who barely drinks away from home AND I got really, really, ridiculously drunk and I LOST MY PHONE! I mean, c'mon, my phone is my lifeline! Because my phone case is also a wallet I lost all my cards as well. I am still holding on to hope that someone will find it, see the name on my drivers license and look me up on Facebook.

The lucky part of that is my phone instantly backs up all my photos to Dropbox so I didn't lose any photos of Finn. Please people, make sure that you do that because I would have been devastated if I had lost them.

So, I have taken this as a message from beyond and have decided I need to sort my shit out big time. This means:

• No more attempting to drink copious amounts of wine and parent the next day
• Focusing on important things like getting my weight back down and being fit
• Not eating every piece of chocolate that has crossed my path
• Continue to write this blog so I don't let everything build up in my head and overload my teeny tiny brain

I started off yesterday by going for a run. However, because my other half is off fishing all weekend, this meant running with the pram. Up hills. I lasted one hill and decided to walk up and run down. I can't be too adventurous people. I also got up this morning and went for a run with no pram (don't worry, I didn't leave the baby at home, Mum rescued me) and I ran for half an hour! With the fat dog! So we are doing well!

I have also set myself a goal - to complete the Auckland Half Marathon again. If I have something in sight then I know I can do it. Although I have done it in just under two hours before, I am going to give myself the goal this year just to complete it. Life is so much harder with a baby, and I need to factor that in!

Have a great Easter everybody, roll around in chocolatey goodness and start the diet next week!

Babies and Exercise

I would like to take you back in time to 2013 - I had no baby, a full time job, and was the fittest I have ever been in my life.

Athleticism does not come naturally to me, I was always okay at sport, never really that fit and was incredibly lazy. I have struggled with my weight since I was about 7 years old, a cheeseburger goes straight to my thighs. Eating is something that has always consumed my life. I am always thinking about it - what I am going to eat next, should I or shouldn't I eat that piece of pizza, what to buy when I go to the supermarket.

However, in 2013 I was FIT. Like proper fit. A typical week consisted of 4-5 runs (lengths varied from 5 - 13kms at a time), two sessions of boot camp and a game of indoor netball. I cut out all crap from my diet, did a 21 Day Sugar Detox and was the slimmest I have ever been. The icing on the cake for me was completing the Auckland Half Marathon in 1hr 59mins, squeezing in just under my goal of two hours.

I honestly believe that my body being in such an optimal position was how I got pregnant without even trying to. During the early stages of my pregnancy I kept trying to run, although exhaustion got the better of me in the end. Boot camp became too much as the instructor wasn't great at giving alternative exercises. So, throughout my pregnancy, I did a lot of walking the dog and managed to stay rather fit. While I was overdue, I was walking up hills every morning, trying to get this baby out (it did not good - he was nine days late!). On reflection, keeping up with exercise was probably how I bounced back so well from my labour, and was out and about really quickly.

Unfortunately, I have found it really hard to get back into exercise since my little man came along. Although I have lost more of the weight, my tummy has that little pooch to it that just won't go away. My commitment to healthy eating has gone out the door due to being too lazy to spend time making it. Poor Sam the dog has felt it as well, and his days of being long and lean appear to be behind him.

BUT NOT ANYMORE!

Today, ladies and gentlemen, I went for a RUN. In fact two runs! My partner and big boy did a fun run, and I was meeting them at the end. I parked my car and started going for walk when the skies opened up on us. First stop was a cafe to hide, and enjoy a coffee and a muffin. We (Finn and myself) then had to make our way to the finish line, which resulted in me running very fast in the pouring rain. Boys finished, we celebrated, then we got home and I had the serious guilt trip going on! This resulted in me hauling my chubby pup out on to the footpath for 2.63kms of running. Yes, I understand that this small, but we did it very fast, and I did have to drag poor pup up the a lot of hills. So I am going to be proud of that.

Watch this space people, before you know it I will be doing regular hour long runs again! Woohoo!